Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Even a Good Change Can Be Hard

Will the Morning Glory bloom? 

There are some big changes on my horizon, and as with many people, change is hard for me.  All of a sudden, it seems, I am asked to leave my comfort zone, and I struggle to embrace this as an opportunity for growth.  I had in my mind that we'd be moving when our lease is up, in a year and a half.  I am doing better now than when the idea to move first appeared.  But to be truthful, I would love to just hide away right now and not deal with all the stuff.  (I need a moving fairy to come!)
I am excited to be possibly buying a house instead of renting, although, this huge debt scares me.  I have grown fond of not having any debt!  I know a house will be different than consumer debt, of course.  I will have to work hard at not wanting more house than we can afford.  This will not be my dream house.  It will be the house we finish our family.  Perhaps the dream house will come later.  Perhaps it will not.  I am at peace with that part of myself, the part that dreams.
Most likely, we will be moving into a slightly smaller house, still spacious, I am sure.  But, we will still need to take a hard look at every object in our possession before we move.  Every.  Last.  Item.

I have made several trips to Good Will.  I have another load to take soon.  Depending on the house, we will purge furniture, too.  I am happy to let it all go.  The more the better, I say!  My kids are trying to go through their stuff as well.  We may be having the boys share a bedroom.  It could get tight.  But I know it will be OK.  Plenty of siblings share rooms.

I am looking forward to making a new place our home, our refuge.  I will be looking for a sunny backyard in which to grow a real garden.  I am looking forward to painting my daughter's room blue, a dream of hers.  If the loan all happens, I will call myself blessed for sure!  Until then, I purge on!!!